Round #2 - Scenes from the Chemo Suite

I got a surprisingly good night's sleep last night, but awoke this morning slightly anxious...

Would my WBCs have rebounded enough for treatment today???  My total WBC has to be over 2 and my ANC over 1.5.  Recall that last Wednesday they were .8 and .1 respectively :tdown

Well, I had to prepare nonetheless!  Nothing to eat, just tons of water (a virtual pink sister swears by fasting the day before chemo to prevent tummy upset and nausea, but I'll settle for the night/morning ;) - it seemed to work last time!), pack the bags...

Ready to Go!
blanket and pillow, lotion and chap-stick, notebook for meeting with onco, iPad and work stuff

Notice whose head is sticking out of the top???  Just in case \m/

AND: Ice for the "A" drug push and granola for a quick snack

I'm really not a Vera Bradley freak, but these bags are SO cute - gifts from my sweet Mama.

Precious daughter is home for several days this week and served as my escort today <3

5 minutes before we left I did the requisite lidocaine application to numb the skin area over my port for a low-pain access :tup

nickel-sized dot over port, then cover with saran wrap ;)

We checked in around 8:30.  MORE forms to complete - "Didn't I do this LAST time?"
Different form, a place to check side effects from last round and write questions for the onco.  Well, okay then.

Back to the lab for vitals, then into the chemo suite to get a blood sample - MUCH easier to use the port than one of my tiny veins ;)

This young nurse was great!

We both have to wear masks while she breaches the port.  First is has to be flushed with Heparin - which has a rather nasty, metallic taste - then blood can be drawn.

Precious daughter and I staked claim to our prize positions in the suite, then set off to drop my vials at the lab down the hall and meet with my onco, still wondering if I'd be UP enough...

Onco came in and, HALLELUJAH!!!  Counts are UP and I'm good to go 8)

Since miss precious was there, I asked about the BRCA test.  He said they could draw blood there and send it off  - IF she'd be okay with me getting the results first...  "Of course!"  The awesome lab nurse :star was even able to find her small vein!  I'm just so relieved that we'll know something relatively soon.

Back to the chemo suite - time to get Round #2 underway!

These chairs recline and are actually quite comfortable!

Had to snap a quick selfie :)

 Like the first round, my first dripped meds were fluids, steroids, and 2 anti-nausea drugs.

My first 4 rounds are the same drug combination (Adriamycin and Cytoxan) - remember the :v???  The first drug has to be administered via a push, over 12-15 minutes, by the nurse:

-RED DEVIL-
But hey, if it works!!!

"Get those ice chips ready!!!" - anecdotal evidence is they help prevent major mouth sores :tup

The push!
(note the cute blankie - from a special cousin)

Next was the Cytoxan drip - one long hour...  "Is it done yet?" (That's ME, not my much more patient precious daughter!)  This time was thankfully uneventful (see round #1 strange occurrence).

Precious daughter <3

Her job isn't over yet!  She's going to drive/accompany me to turn in some HR documents tomorrow for work, then back to floor #4 for my Neulasta injection :brow

Thanks to all of you who sent sweet messages and good wishes for today - I SO appreciate it!

Another special cousin and I were talking on Monday evening as I walked my requisite 30 minutes on the treadmill.  She told me I sounded "light and free" (compared to those major pain days).  I told her I couldn't explain it, of course I FELT much better, but it's truly more than that - I KNOW that it's all the prayer warriors out there sending me such a strong and sustaining sense of support and encouragement :h 

The higher power is THE power!!!

And she shared this verse:

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.  For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

2 Corinthians 4: 17-18

Round #2... also in the books :)

My Forever Cheerleader

Many of you have told me lately how much you admire my strength.  Well, I come from strong stock!

My Daddy was a career Army officer, a Davidson College graduate who put himself through school on academic and ROTC scholarships while also playing college football.  He prided himself on being self-sufficient, and was a firm but calm parent and role model for me and my brother.

My Mama was a high school beauty queen (voted Senior Superlative: Most Attractive) with a friendly, outgoing spirit; my precious daughter has her Nana's personality.  She had a big role to play as an officer's wife, attending endless military functions, hosting coffees, and packing up every few years for a move, all the while keeping us in line - most of the time ;)

They were high school sweethearts <3

Here are two of my favorite pix of them:

We've had our rough times, as most mothers and daughters do - just ask my OWN precious thing about that ;) - but have remained close, through many of life's trials.

These two raised us while traveling the world per Daddy's inevitable regular repostings (Alaska, Oklahoma, Texas, Florida, back to Texas, North Carolina - where we lived near Mama's parents while Daddy served in Vietnam, Colorado, Indiana, Belgium, and finally Georgia).  I'm a social studies and geography nerd because of my life experiences.

When Daddy passed, my brother and I worried a lot about Mama.  Would she really be okay?  How would she handle living in the house alone?  Would she be able to take care of her finances, the house itself, the yard, etc.?  Would she retreat inward or seek solace among good friends and her church?

HOW could we have EVER doubted her steely determination to "soldier on" with her life???  And I know it's not been easy... at all.

My Mama is a truly amazing woman; I can't BEGIN to share in how many ways.

She has always been, and continues to be, my most fervent cheerleader.

I KNOW it hurts her to see me go through this difficult period, I hear it in her voice and see it in her eyes; I have my own daughter, with her own health issues, for whom I'd give ANYTHING to bear type 1 diabetes and a hearing loss in her stead.  Nevertheless, my Mama is there, always.  To listen to me weep and complain, to pep me up on down days, to love me always, regardless.

She means the world to me, she is my mother, and my best friend <3

So I wore Bertha today... to make her feel less like the mom of a cancer patient.

AND, so she can admire the wig that will be HERS once this ordeal is over :tup

Hair... No More!

Why the "preemptive strike"?

1. My head was itching, my hair was thinning, and I KNEW it would ALL be gone between Days 14 and Day 21.
2. As I've said before, I really didn't want to have it all in my bed, shower, and clothing, OR find Cooper eating it!
3. I need to feel I'm in control of SOMETHING in this sea of unknowns :tup

So... 

I had scheduled the appointment for Friday, July 27th, but had two lousy days on Wednesday and Thursday (bone pain from Neulasta can be AS BAD AS CHILDBIRTH :~), and was considering putting it off.  But Monday was out for my hairdresser, Tuesday was out for me, and Wednesday of next week is ROUND #2!!!  So I decided to keep the appointment and hope for the best \m/

Friday morning dawned, I rolled over in bed, and realized the pain had subsided substantially - a Tylenol (or 3) did the trick - so we were good to go :e

One of my besties was coming to pick me up, and my mom was scheduled to meet us at the salon.  Well, hubby sent me a text to ask how I was feeling (have I mentioned how AWESOME he is???) and the time of my appointment.  When I told him, he said he'd meet me there.  "Why?  You're already at work!" I asked.  His reply was, "I'm gonna come get my head shaved with you."  WOW!!!  I was floored, and cried on the spot :c

We got to the salon, and another of my besties (friends since we were 15) was there too!!!  I've had to cut her out of the pix, though - she's an online-o-phobe, and I can respect that ;)

My precious hair stylist did a FANTASTIC job - another supporter and prayer warrior :angel

AND...    

Here's how it went:

BEFORE the strike!

I have NO idea what was so funny :)

I guess I'm ready for this! 

Here we GO!!!

Note the thinning spot :(

No turning back now!!!

"I think I've changed my mind..."

"Yea, right!  You're NEXT, Sweetheart :)"

Mission complete and successful!

"What was I thinking???"

He doesn't have as much to lose - lol!

I think he looks purty bald :)

Can't thank him enough for the sacrifice and show of support <3 <3 <3

I LOVE these gals and guy (note the cropped bestie ;))

Now...

I'm looking forward to a few "feel good" days before my next treatment.  I've learned a lot from my journey so far, not the least of which is to take things one day at a time.

Thought I'd share a couple of special messages from some special people - I've had SO many, and thank ALL of you who are praying for me:

What Cancer Can't Do

Cancer is so limited...

It cannot cripple love,

It cannot shatter hope,

It cannot corrode faith,

It cannot eat away peace,

It cannot destroy confidence,

It cannot shut out memories,

It cannot silence courage,

It cannot invade the soul,

It cannot reduce eternal life,

It cannot quench the Spirit,

It cannot lessen the power of resurrection,

Our greatest enemy is not disease,

but despair.

~from a friend of my mother, written by a fellow church member

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to and end;

they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

"The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in Him."

Lamentations 3:22-24

The GOOD, the BAD, and the UGLY

THE GOOD

Yesterday was blood work day, one week after my first round of chemo.  This is the mid-point between my dose dense treatments when we look to see how the drugs have affected my white blood cell (WBC) counts (immune system fighting power).  Numbers were in the pits!!!  I went from a pre-chemo WBC of 5.4 (normal range is 4.0-10.9) to a post-chemo WBC of 0.8.  My ANC (absolute neutrophil - the active part of the system) was pre-chemo 3.3 (normal range is 1.4-7.8) to post-chemo 0.1 - WOW!!!

So... I'm highly susceptible to infection right now and have been put on a serious antibiotic - more meds, FUN!!!  I've already been taking precautions and have used more hand sanitizer in the past week than I have my whole life ;-)  It should kick in after today, so I should WILL be fine!

Well, late yesterday evening I began experiencing SEVERE back pain (9 or 10 on a 1-10 scale), crawled up the stairs to lay down, tried to brace myself against the pain, and had my precious daughter - who is only home for the night before galavanting off to AL to visit a good friend - call the after hours Nurse Line for me (no way could I even pick up my phone!).  My oncologist actually called back within 2 minutes (Have I shared what an AWESOME care team I have???) and said for me to take a Claritin and a pain pill...  Let me explain why:

The day after each of my chemo treatments I go back in for a shot of Neulasta, a drug formulated to enhance bone marrow production of WBCs and help patients rebound to be ready for subsequent treatments - yes, it's a true gift!  The well known side effects of this med include severe bone pain and muscle aches.  Anecdotal evidence indicates taking Claritin can reduce or eliminate this pain, and the recommended plan is taking it 1-2 days prior to chemo through 3-4 days afterward (I DID this!!!).  So why the pain NOW???  Darned if I know!  BUT, after doing some late-night-on-pain-meds-still-can't-sleep research, I found that the Neulasta acts in an individualized way (hey, I'm ALL about 
that ;-) and tends to kick in at the nadir, or low point of the ANC!

Where's the good news in this?  

My WBC/ANC is likely bouncing back!!!!!!!!!!!!  Yahoo :e

I SO don't want to get off track with my chemo treatment regimen - stay the course and kick this BC's A$$!

MORE good news - 

Precious daughter is here for me to hug her neck for a little while :)

She's SO funny, and shared with me a VERY silly iPad app (yes, a juvenile one) in which you can create a character and take your picture with it :r  

So we tried it with Cooper:

THE BAD

While I was having my blood drawn for labs yesterday, my oncologist stopped by and asked me to see him before leaving (I wasn't scheduled for an actual appt, just blood work).  So hubby and I went back, and I got some pretty crappy news.  My BRCA test results came back, and I'm positive for a BRCA2 genetic mutation which puts me at high risk for a secondary BC in my other breast AND ovarian cancer - even with this chemo :(  Worse yet, my precious daughter, awesome son, and dear brother each have a 50:50 chance of having this mutation/high risk as well - think Angelina Jolie???  We'll pursue testing and go from there...

PLEASE!!!  If you have BC in your first degree relatives, or BC in a second degree relative and another cancer in a first degree relative on the same side, consider having the BRCA test run - it could save your life <3
Here's a link for more info: BRAC Analysis Brochure

AND

THE UGLY

So, following chemo, we discuss plans for a prophylactic mastectomy of the the other "sister" and removal of my ovaries or hysterectomy :@  Will this NEVER end???

Yesterday was a true pity-party day, BUT, today's a NEW DAY!!!

Bone pain is still pretty awful, but I'll just take another nice pain pill, and spend the day resting and trying to prep for fall classes :)

Hair today, Gone tomorrow!

Well, it’s starting.  The hair (notice I’ve de-personalized it ;-) has been noticeably thinning the past couple of days, but I was TOLD - by the “professional” people - IT would happen between days 14 and 21!!!  According to my virtual pink sisters, however, the time varies based on chemo drugs and individuals, and while most have said day 14-15 was IT for them, a couple have said IT started happening around day 7.  Well folks, it’s ONLY day 6!!!

The signs???  

• Tingliness began a couple of days ago - I thought it was the chemo, of course indirectly it IS, right?
• Itchiness in the morning - even though I’m using a mild, moisturizing shampoo
• Hair in my sink!!! (“Dammit” - time for a whacking of the doll!!!)

I scheduled an appointment for a shave to put me in CONTROL of something ;-) this Friday morning (call, message, or email me if you want to see it in person!!!).  I wanted to do Saturday, but already have something on the books - thinking that would be plenty of time to prevent going through the hair on my pillow, in my shower, down my shirt, on my carpet, in Cooper’s mouth...  Sigh.

You all know I have Bertha on standby, but I’m just not keen to wear her everyday - it’s a personal decision, and regardless of how many people tell me, “Oh, it looks JUST like YOUR hair!” or “That looks so natural,” I’m just not inclined to be a daily wig wearer.  I AM glad I have her for those professional occasions when I’m not comfortable broadcasting, “Hey, I have cancer!”

I’ve found some super cute ways to wear scarves (check the out here and here) and, thanks to a friend, found a great site to order some cute hats :)  I also had a hat done recently for my precious daughter, and got one for me TOO:

Cute, huh?  Let me know if you’re interested, a friend makes them :)

Oh well, if THIS is part of what it takes to knock out those nasty lingering cells, I’m in :)

On a POSITIVE note, I learned last night at the Look Good, Feel Better session (check out the link and share with others who might benefit) how to use makeup to create an eyebrow, thicken thinning eyelashes, cover dark circles and de-emphasize chemo puffiness!

AND - drum roll please...

I can put on a regular shirt ALL BY MYSELF!

I also think my new “sister” looks pretty good :)

Planning for the Future at a One-Day-at-a-Time Pace

Those of you who know me well are quite aware of my "control freak" tendencies.

While I've really mellowed in midlife - it's true! Just ask my precious daughter - I still feel the need to make plans, write notes, create a roadmap of sorts for my day-week-month, etc.  Well, breast cancer's really challenging this modus operandi!!!

I awake everyday now in fear of the unknown.  "Fear" may not be the right word, maybe trepidation or anxiousness, or LACK of CONTROL!  Even something as simple as planning for a friend's birthday dinner is challenging.  Is Tuesday a "good" day?  Well, H-E-2 hockey sticks, I don't have a clue!!!  So I'm learning - slowly - to say, "That sounds like a plan... (unless)." 

Patience is one of those characteristics that's always eluded me...

• During the last weeks of my first pregnancy with my awesome son, the baby room furniture sat in boxes, walls un-stenciled, clothes not yet washed.  I'd been put on half-days at work, to rest.  But, lacking the patience to allow dear hubby to complete the tasks (at least the more labor-intensive parts), I did it all myself!!!  And I have to admit it looked good :)
• After a few years in our first house, the lovely linoleum in our kitchen had seen its better days.  We'd talked about replacing it, but the task wasn't high on dear hubby's "to-do" list.  So, one day while he was at work (this was during my stay-at-home-mom phase), I proceeded to rip it all up, measure the area, purchase some Pergo flooring, lay out the subfloor cover, set up the saw horses, grab a back saw (I didn't even know we HAD a circular saw, and couldn't have used it if I had!), and began to lay the new floors.  I can't share his reaction - some of you might be offended ;-) - but I was DANG proud!!!  Hubby finally relented, set up the saw, and helped cut pieces to my size specs :):):)  We even did the dining room and foyer.
• And, about mini Cooper...  We lost our wonderful coon hound, Howie, three years ago this summer. 
  
  He'd been part of our family since we lost my Daddy, and I was feeling lonely without a four-legged friend.  Our precious daughter was going though a rough time, and I thought (because Moms know best, right?) it would be great to get her a puppy for Christmas!  No need to ask anyone, this was MY surprise :)  I'll spare you the details, but suffice it to say this decision would have been better with a dose of patience ;-)

Perhaps this is part of God's plan, forcing me to grow and change?  

Funny how my plans for a transitional summer (insert long list of things to do) have suddenly morphed into a plan to make each day count, take everything in stride (with personal permission for the occasional "pity party"), and move forward with hope and some patience :)  

One of Mama's friends sent a sweet email that described discerning the important things in life from the mundane as "separating the wheat from the chaff."  While I can't really enjoy the wheat (thank you celiac disease), her message is well taken.  

Of course I'm about to start (I'm actually already in the middle of this process - just breaking for a blog post) boxing up books for the move to my new office :).  Guess I need more practice...  or perhaps this is the wheat!!!  (Or rice, or quinoa, or some other non-gluten grain - lol).

Pictures from:
http://tandemforsgren.blogspot.com/2012/07/mia-control-freak.html
http://habituallychic.blogspot.com/2010/09/sick-day.html

Day 3 and I Feel Like Cooper... or So THIS is "Chemo Fatigue!"

Dogs have a curious sleep pattern.  While most would argue they're diurnal, I know MY doggies have always been able to nap anywhere, anytime!  This is ME today:

I felt pretty good on Day 1 (chemo day) and Day 2 (shot day - Neulasta), but today???  Wow!!!

I'd heard about this type of fatigue, that it's quite different from general tiredness or lethargy, but the descriptions didn't prepare me for this!

Sleep was better last night:  dozed off around 10:30, up around 3:30 (nightly restroom break ;-), read some of my current iBook selection, "hi" to Fred around 4:45, "bye" to Fred around 5:30, back to sleep (!!! this is good), up at 6:30 - did I really sleep an hour?, up again at 7:30 - another hour?

Rather than dozing off again, I dragged myself out of bed, only to find I felt like I'd not really slept!  A bit groggy, shaky (not the low blood sugar kind), unsteady, sluggish...  Well, THIS was not going to be the way I spent my day!  So I went downstairs for my morning java and meds, came back upstairs and dressed, went back down for my breakfast of oatmeal with extra protein (and a prune for good measure), then out with Cooper for what I thought would be a nice little morning walk.  Well, today's trash day in the neighborhood, and ANYTHING that throws mini Cooper off of his expected schedule means the walk won't go well.  He started off dragging me down the sidewalk, then wanted to cross the street, NOT at one of our usual places (really?).  So back home we went!  That took all of about 10 minutes.

So, feeling I needed some fresh air, I grabbed my teaching materials and sat on the back deck (covered and shaded from the sun, but open to the nice morning breeze - well, a little bit of a breeze).  Cooper assumed the flop in his basking spot over in the sun.  This was okay for about five minutes, when I realized my ankles were swelling again - did I mention THAT fun issue?  Well, let me fill you in...  

A good friend came over with her doggie yesterday evening and we went for a walk.  It was still a bit muggy, and I'd been on my feet most of the day.  The walk was nice - a slow, chatty stroll - then we sat for a while on the deck out back.  I noticed then that my ankles were rather swollen :(

Rats!!!  This is a known side effect of chemo, and I thought I was doing SO good!  We sat a little while longer, with my feet propped on the table, but it got worse so we had to call it a night.

I took a warm bath - something a virtual pink sister said was a "no-no" with swelling (should have iced them instead) - and proceeded to prop them on my way-too-expensive Brookstone wedge pillow, purchased so I could sleep after my surgery!  At least I'm still able to put it to good use ;-)

My ankles look a little better here, but you can tell where my legs were swelling too :(

They were mostly better this morning, but I knew not to stay on my feet too much today...   Well, no problem THERE!!!

Back to the chemo fatigue.  

Hubby has a recliner that most everyone loves.  Here's my precious daughter and mini Cooper in said chair:

I don't normally sit in it, but I thought it might come in handy today, to both rest and elevate my feet.  Well dang it, I wasn't heavy enough to keep it in the completely reclined position - ARGH!  Intent not to fail at this, I grabbed a sofa pillow and afghan, propped my feet on the pillow, and covered myself up (too lazy to get up and turn off the ceiling fan).  I thought I'd take a 15-minute power nap, but it turned into a 2-hour, not-moving-even-though-my-cell-rang-3-times nap!  I'm typically a fidgety sleeper (ask hubby), but I swear, I literally did not move!

Finally, realizing I NEEDED to get up and eat some lunch, I drug myself out of the chair, ate a bite (followed by the requisite tooth brushing and dry mouth swishing), and proceeded to the post office to mail a package and to CVS for some compression garments (per my oncologist's office after I called about the swelling).  The P.O. stop was a success, not so much at CVS - the selection was minimal, and the items were $27 PER STOCKING!!!  We'll do a Walmart run later this evening.  I won't likely be driving - my garage parking in this state wasn't the best, I almost ran into the house ;-)

Round #1 is in the Books!

Just a quick update - with some details for those who are interested

If you've checked in on Facebook, you'll know that I felt SO relaxed going in this morning.  When the nurse called me back for pre-chemo blood work she asked if I was anxious or nervous, and I had to answer honestly, "You know, not really!  I mean, nothing worse than the usual nerves I get being in a medical office in general."  What a blessing!!!

After blood work I saw my oncologist who shared I'm a bit anemic (Hematocrit of 9.5 and it should be 12, Hemaglobin 9.9 also).  Well, knock me over with a sneeze!!!  My Hemaglobin pre-port placement surgery was 7!!!
So I was ecstatic   with 9.5 even if it IS a bit low.  So we went ahead with chemo with the understanding I may need a transfusion before #2 (we'll see about THAT!).

Back to the "chemo suite" - yes, a large, windowed area with about 25 recliners situated such that you can visit or not (today was a private, between-me-Fred-and-the-staff kinda day).  They have wi fi, hence my Fb posts, and free coffee!
Fred was a happy camper (for the most part - I love him for being a real trooper right along with me).

First the pre-meds:  saline (not really a med, but infused nonetheless), nausea stuff, and steroids.

Then the first BIG GUN!!!  This med (Adriamycin) has to be given via a "push" through an area in the IV infusion tubing straight in by a nurse (no drip, drip, drip, drip...).  Take your hand and make the ASL sign for the letter "o" - THAT's the size of these 2 bad boy syringes, each about 6" long, and red as a liquid can be!!!
I new about it, so was prepared -  - for the push, the need to suck on ice to hopefully stave off mouth sores and thrush, and the red pee!

Next, the second chemo drug (Cytoxan) via the IV drip.  Uneventful for about 10 minutes, when suddenly the left side of my tongue began to get numb!???  I also felt a strange sensation across my chest.  I called the nurse over and shared.  Yes, it was odd!  She stopped the drip, checked my vitals (all good) and spoke with the oncologist.  In the mean time, I had to pull out my little Dammit Doll (if you don't know about these, check it out - way too cute: http://dammitdolls.com/
Anyway, my precious daughter gave me one after I told her about my dx (I had given HER one last year when she was going through a rough spot), then a wonderful friend gave me one too!  We decided I'd keep one in my bedroom and one in the car (for road rage!).  I grabbed it from the console and stuck it in my chemo bag today, so when this happened, I pulled out that bad girl and gave her a whack!!!  I lie, not really, I just thought about her, took her out, and posed her for a picture (thank you sweet cousin for the pillow she rested on):

We restarted at half the pace (another 2 hours - oh well).
All told we were there from 8:30 to 1:30, but accomplished A LOT!  In my opinion at least!

The afternoon and evening???

1. CVS run
2. Home for a lunch of tuna and GF crackers (nothing raw anymore!) 
3. Work-related emails, etc.
4. Support-related emails, etc.
5. Load of laundry
6. Publix run
7. Phone calls
8. Yummy dinner of salmon, asparagus, and sweet potatoes
9. Blog post!
10. Would have taken mini-Cooper for a walk but it's storming so...
11. Treadmill time!
12. SLEEP!!! (I hope - steroids do strange things!)

Right now I just feel a little "off" - nothing new for those of you who really KNOW me ("wink" - not searching for the html code for a winking smiley right now!).

I'm planning to meet some friends tomorrow for lunch (water or coffee for me - I'll bring my food), and hope to drive, which has been SO MUCH EASIER thanks to this gift from my sweet aunt:

Hugs and love to all of you who are taking the time to read my therapy!

Angels... EVERYWHERE!

If you've been following my saga, you already know how very blessed I've been since my diagnosis.  It's funny how the "busy-ness" of life can prevent true awareness of the gifts of family, friendship, and community.

Today I got a new "sister" :)  In truth, I got TWO new sisters, one for my chest, and one for my heart.  Mama went with me to a specialty boutique where I was fitted for a breast prosthesis (since I'm not having reconstruction - at least not any time in the near future).  I was nervous and still somewhat in a state of disbelief about the whole thing, but this dear boutique owner has a story of her own!  She didn't share it outright, but during the course of the fitting and order, I was touched by the truly blessed soul of a pink sister.

I only want to share SOME of the MANY blessings that have come my way, thanks to many of you!!!

• Cards enough to fill a wall (that I see every morning upon waking)
• Lovely flowers and plants (that beautify my surroundings)
• Emails, texts, and Facebook messages galore (that I read more than once)
• A phone call from abroad (that meant the world to me)
• Verses and stories of courage and strength (that let me know I'm not alone)
• Meals and gifts (some of which I wear every day - not the meals of course, except on my hips ;-)
• Hugs and offers of help (that put me at ease)
• and Peace beyond description as I face this new phase of the fight

I'll close this post with two thoughts, the first from a dear Delta Kappa Gamma sister: 

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7

and this from a new online pink sister who also starts treatment tomorrow:

"... I am looking forward to the healing gift of chemotherapy to clear out any cancer remaining!" 

Hugs to ALL of you!  
I'm humbled by your love and support ♡

A Few Things I've Learned... so far!

1.  I was BCS (breast cancer stupid) a few short weeks ago.  I've known women who've fought the battle, but didn't realize how just varied this cancer can be! 

• There are several types of BC, based on the location of the original tumor and how it spreads:
• In Situ breast cancer is still contained within the ducts or lobules.
• Invasive or infiltrating breast cancer has grown through the walls of the ducts or lobules and spread to surrounding tissue, possibly into the lymph nodes, and/or other parts of the body.
• Not only are there stages of BC that are based on how far the cancer has spread (0, 1a, 1b, 2a, 2b, 3a, 3b, 3c, 4), there are different grades of tumors (1, 2, 3) based on the aggressiveness and speed of growth (mine is invasive ductal, stage 2b, grade 3).
• BC treatment depends on the stage and grade PLUS the breast cancer's physical structure relative to the hormones estrogen (ER) and progesterone (PR), and HER2 status (a genetic growth factor).  So a BC can be ER+ or ER-, PR+ or PR-, and HER2+ or HER2- (mine is ER-/PR+, HER2-).
• Alcohol and sugar can feed certain types of BC (yikes!): Check it out HERE 
• Many women with BC are deficient in vitamin D3 (including me!): See what you can do HERE
• In case you're interested in learning more, here are some great sites:
• http://www.breastcancer.org/
• http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/types/breast
• http://beyondtheshock.com/
• http://www.guide2breastcancer.com/

2.  Prayers matter, and I believe they are the reason SO many things have fallen into place, turned out right, or been relatively easy so far.

• My ob-gyn is one of many special angels for insisting I see a surgeon for a second opinion, even though my mammo and ultrasound were clear in May.  Love him!  He even called to check on me post-surgery and offered support :)
• My surgeon is an artist!  He was able to excise my lymph nodes (9 of them) through my single mastectomy incision rather than making another one under my arm, AND he placed my port so it might be hidden by my bra!
• My new PCP and her staff have made me feel cared for and are handling so many of the details for me.
• Our insurance is better than we thought!!!
• Regardless of my small, often rolling veins, ALL of the sticks I've endured for blood work and IVs have worked the first time with relatively little pain! 
• My right arm range of motion is nearly normal only 3.5 weeks after surgery - Go Me!!!

3.  I'm stronger than I thought!

I remember sharing after my Daddy passed that if anyone had told me two years prior that not only would we watch my young, otherwise healthy father battle pancreatic cancer, but that our precious six-year-old daughter would be diagnosed with type 1 (juvenile) diabetes, I'd have fallen into the pits of depression and been totally unable to function.

But, God truly does give us only what we can handle - even with this.  I know I'm not alone in my fight!

4.  My dog is an adorable but extremely neurotic companion!!!

This is Cooper, who really wasn't supposed to be MY dog! (it's a long story)

He senses something is wrong and, while he's always followed me around the house, he's literally my shadow these days!  After my surgery he was SO confused because we had to use pillows to keep him from laying across me!

He's also recently taken to doing his business in the dining room (bad dog!) because I've not always been able to go WITH him outside lately - sigh.  And, according to hubby, while I was away for a short, enjoyable weekend before my first treatment this week, mini Cooper didn't eat and refused to take a walk while I was gone! 

Crazy little guy, but he IS awfully cute :):):)

(notice his special HEART spot)

Selected pictures from: 

http://b-i.forbesimg.com/meghanbiro/files/2013/05/elearning_image1.jpg

http://becomingfouroldbiddies.blogspot.com/2012/08/strong-women.html

http://www.abstract-soul.com/the-prayer-of-a-failure.php

The Waiting is the Hardest Part!

C'mom, how much longer?

Port inserted

Chemotherapy education completed
Echocardiogram okay for chemo
Prescriptions for meds
OTC meds (did I mention I don't like taking meds?)
Checklists & emergency #s written down
Wig, headscarves, and cute hats ready
Prayers & support of family & friends


Well, it's Friday, July 12th (or close enough!).  Time for a test (yes, that's the teacher in me ).

Multiple Choice
Directions:  Circle the best answer to complete the sentence below.

I have five (5) more days before ______________________________________.

A.  some horribly toxic drugs will flow through my veins, bringing unknown nasty side effects.
B.  the miracles of medical science will be put to work, sending an army of cancer-killing warriors on the hunt for rogue bad guys in my body.

Correct Answer:  B

A special friend and fellow PINK SISTER (she's really more of a guide and role model) told me she actually looks forward to her chemo sessions because she knows they're making her cancer-free!  She suggested I visualize the poison medicine working in my body, helping it do its job.

Think I'll try it


Picture from: http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2010/08/23/waiting-is-the-hardest-part/